Horsenipples.com

Posted By McFatty on June 24, 2009

June 24, 2009

Associated Press

GRAND FORKS, N.D. - A North Dakota woman accused of breast-feeding her six-week-old baby while drunk has pleaded guilty to child neglect.Twenty-six-year-old Stacey Anvarinia could face up to five years in prison when she’s sentenced on the felony charge in August.Judge Sonja Clapp says Anvarinia will not have to register as an offender against children.Police officers who responded to a domestic disturbance call at Anvarinia’s home April 13 say they saw an intoxicated Anvarinia breast feeding.Health officials say alcohol consumed by breast-feeding mothers can be absorbed into an infant’s system.

via TheSpec.com - BreakingNews - Woman caught breast-feeding while drunk.

I’d really like to get drunk this way.

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Posted By McFatty on June 22, 2009

What I expect will most probably happen is that my body will fail, my mind will cease to function, and that will be that. My genes will not live on, because I have had no children. Perhaps I have been infertile. If I discover that somewhere along the way I conceived a child, let that child step forward and he or she will behold a happy man. Through my wife, I have had stepchildren and grandchildren, and I love them unconditionally, which is the only kind of love worth bothering with.

I am comforted by Richard Dawkins’ theory of memes. Those are mental units: thoughts, ideas, gestures, notions, songs, beliefs, rhymes, ideals, teachings, sayings, phrases, clichés, that move from mind to mind as genes move from body to body. After a lifetime of writing, teaching, broadcasting and happily torturing people with my jokes, I will leave behind more memes than many. They will all eventually die as well, but so it goes.

I drank for many years in a tavern that had a photograph of Brendan Behan on the wall, and under it this quotation, which I memorized:

I respect kindness in human beings first of all, and kindness to animals. I don’t respect the law; I have a total irreverence for anything connected with society except that which makes the roads safer, the beer stronger, the food cheaper and the old men and old women warmer in the winter and happier in the summer.

via It’s sweltering hot out - Roger Ebert’s Journal.

An Eloquent article by Roger Ebert on the subject of his own death.

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Posted By McFatty on June 22, 2009

John Hodgeman Discusses the Geek President

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Posted By McFatty on June 16, 2009

YouTube - The Curse of Cheddar Bay

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Posted By McFatty on June 11, 2009

YouTube - Pachelbel Rant.

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Posted By McFatty on June 11, 2009

“Ladies - it’s never too late to learn how to keep your business clean and UTI free.

Let this song be your guide. Remember, “Front to Back” - according to this song, “There are dangerous amoeba that can hurt yer cooter so!”

“Hey girl, mind the flaps!”

I’m going to go throw up now - but a much more educated vomit, of course.”

via Mind-Melting Demo Disasters - Ladies - it’s never too late to learn how to keep….

Wonderful music.

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Posted By McFatty on February 22, 2009

paintings

some really awesome paintings.

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Posted By McFatty on January 19, 2009

Wealthy men give women more orgasms

Jonathan Leake, Science and Environment Editor

Scientists have found that the pleasure women get from making love is directly

linked to the size of their partner’s bank balance.

via Wealthy men give women more orgasms - Times Online.

Women. I tell ya.

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Posted By McFatty on January 18, 2009

LOLClits.

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Posted By McFatty on January 17, 2009

Casu marzu also called casu modde, casu cundhídu, or in Italian formaggio marcio is a traditional sheep milk cheese, notable for being riddled with live insect larvae. Although outlawed there for health reasons, it is found mainly in Sardinia, Italy on the black market. Casu marzu literally means “rotten cheese” in Sardinian and is known colloquially as maggot cheese.

via Casu marzu - Wikipedia, the free encyclopedia.

The best part is that apparently when those freaks eat it, the maggots jump in your eyes.

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Posted By McFatty on December 27, 2008

FAIL Blog: Pictures and Videos of Owned, Pwnd and Fail Moments.

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Posted By McFatty on December 20, 2008

Dec. 15, 2008 — Past studies have linked an individual’s intelligence to his or her height, cardiovascular function and longevity, but now a new study suggests semen quality may be added to that list, since it also appears to help predict the level of a man’s intelligence.

via Semen Quality Linked to Intelligence : Discovery News.

No wonder I have such great kids.

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Posted By McFatty on December 15, 2008

A mother in the Belgian tourist haven of Ghent has been accused by her estranged husband of selling her newborn twin boys for more than $13,000 to pay for cosmetic surgery.

Marc Poppe, 48, told an undercover reporter for Dutch television that Sonia Ringoir, 31, had sold the babies to a friend to fund liposuction, the fat removal procedure. He said the couple had searched the Internet to find a quick way to make money: “It was financially attractive to us. Of course we wouldn’t do it for nothing.”

via FOXNews.com - Belgian Mother Accused of Selling Newborn Twins for Cosmetic Surgery - International News | News of the World | Middle East News | Europe News.

Hey look, a bummer post!

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Posted By McFatty on December 15, 2008

JoyceLynn Aryan Nation Campbell, Honszlynn Hinler Jeannie Campbell and Adolf Hitler Campbell.

Good names for a trio of toddlers? Heath and Deborah Campbell think so. The Holland Township couple has picked those names and the oldest child, Adolf Hitler Campbell, turns 3 today.

This has given rise to a problem, because the ShopRite supermarket in Greenwich Township has refused to make a cake for young Adolf’s birthday.

via Holland Township family angry that supermarket won’t personalize cake for their son - The Express-Times | Lehigh Valley PA Newspaper - lehighvalleylive.com

Campbells. Figures.

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Posted By McFatty on December 14, 2008

BEAUMONT - A 10-year-old girl is dead in Beaumont, Texas after being hit by a trailer during a Christmas parade.

via TheSpec.com - BreakingNews - Child dies in Christmas parade.

I am thinking of posting every time I find a true bummer of  a news story, but I don’t know if I can beat this one.

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